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20 something sitcom
I just made a sitcom. I'd love it if you checked it out and left some sweet feedback. It's about 5 guys that live together and encounter socially awkward situations.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Tim King on -
Canned laughter is basically the televised form of all that cataclysmic teeth gnashing and pig slaughtering you hear about in the Bible.
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Permalink Reply by Tim King on
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Also please try to take this as constructively as possible, and I know this may be difficult because I myself am terrible when dealing with criticism levied towards me about a labor of love, but you need a script doctor. Possibly Jack Kevorkian. I mean no disrespect towards the effort you've obviously put towards this, because it's more love and care than I've ever put into any of my ideas and I respect that, but this is a bro/college sitcom. With shows like Community, and arguably the League et al, evolving those genres as far as television is concerned, your show is taking a step back into stiff, punchline oriented dialogue and archetypical characters who have no more depth than what we are supposed to already know based on their stereotype because they're only allowed to live in situational cliches that do nothing to expose any other facets of their personality, but instead are strung together, gag to gag.
I'm not saying everything has to be as character driven as a lot of shows are becoming these days, nor are you forced to be wildly innovative with your plots, but if you're going to bill this to be about "Five guys living together", there should be more character, and if their situations are all going to be socially awkward, I've seen violent rejections from a female and "missing" food among roommates before; find something so awkward my skin crawls.
Don't give up, but before episode two happens, I implore you, no matter what you think about what I've said, to think about your intention, purpose, and direction for this project. It would be a shame for something you've put so much time into to end up as Youtube series white noise.
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Permalink Reply by JBudd on -
Nice, some solid feedback. All my friends I show haven't been giving me very real feedback. They just say it's good.
I've been trying to get some feedback on the laughtrack and the 2 other people I made it with didn't even look at it. and the people I did get feedback from, I don't trust their opinions. So it looks like the consensus is no laugh track.
thanks again.
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Permalink Reply by Tim King on
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You may want to check out "Undeclared". It's an Apatow that ran for like a season about college life, except if I remember it was set in a dorm and not a house.
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Permalink Reply by John Reckzeny on -
"College life" is incredibly dull on TV--you gotta change it up. Ditch the canned laughter.
And these "socially awkward situations" are situations that everyone has been through, seen 1000x times, etc. It's just not interesting. Maybe I'm a hater but the idea of watching college kids do "college things" seems dreadful.
Pros: You've invested in a nice camera--the shots look great. You clearly demonstrate good talent with respect to direction as your video is well done. Keep filming videos, making movies, etc.
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Permalink Reply by JBudd on
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I've never seen a sitcom about college life, so I think it's a good idea. I keep hearing about community, I'll have to check it out. I honestly don't watch that much TV.
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Permalink Reply by Kimba McG on -
Community is the best comedy on TV currently. You really should watch it, and the meta humour is so clever and on the nose that I think a lot of people don't get it. Which just makes it even more amusing for those who do. Your brain will be filled with plot bunnies after watching though!
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Permalink Reply by JBudd on
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I've watched the office, parks and rec, outsourced, arrested development and malcom in the middle. These aren't as funny to me as Seinfeld or How I met your mother. So I'm trying to pattern the style after those. I'm obviously not as good as them, cuz... they've been doing it for awhile. It seems like that style has been dying out, but my favorite sitcoms have been that style.
Thanks for watching.
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