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Dating....who pays?
Questions for all the 20SB. Who pays for the first date? Do you offer to split? Do you expect to split? What about 2 weeks into a relationship...do you still split on dates?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Kate on -
I always offer but if a guy asked me for money before I got a chance to offer I think I'd be pretty turned off.
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Permalink Reply by Lexi on -
if he asked me out... then he's definitely paying. there's no argument about that and there's no way I'm splitting it. If you can't afford to take me out, then don't ask- it shows me that you're irresponsible if you can't afford to cover both.
My bf and I split it by paying every other time usually. or whoever has enough money to cover that week (since we have opposite paydays. he gets paid the first week of the month, i get paid the second week, etc.) its never really been much of an issue with us, we just fell into that pattern. Or if its a pretty large amount, we'll split it, or one of us will pick up the tip.
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Permalink Reply by Sean Weathers on -
assuming this a male and female date...first date should be the guy (if he wants to have another date) and after that splitting is a good idea.
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Permalink Reply by David Stehle on -
I like to believe chivalry isn't dead...or at least it's not dead to me.
So even if she has two capable hands and makes more than me, I’m still opening the door and picking up the check (even if she asked me out).
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Permalink Reply by Andhari on -
KUDOS to this!
Girls where I live totally appreciate men like this. We're basically taught and lecture for hours to date men like this. Haha.
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Permalink Reply by Scott Howard on -
The dude pays. The guy should always offer to pay. If the relationship progresses further and becomes serious then it is nice if the girl insists on paying every once in a while I suppose.
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Permalink Reply by Shayna on -
I always offer to split... and honestly I'm more comfortable that way. There's a feminist rebel part of me that (possibly unattractively) wants it clear that if I'm with you, it's because I like you - not because I need you to pay for my dinner (or anything else).
That said, if the guy I'm with grabs it first, or whatever, I'm only going to argue so much because I feel like being excessive about it makes me look ridiculous and petty. I do expect that the man I'm dating will insist or try to insist on paying, which is why I always want to make sure he knows that that's not why I went out with him.
At the point where its a relationship - joint plans, an assumption that weekends are being spent together, etc., I think it becomes more of a split or a question of who gets it this time verus next time... etc.
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Permalink Reply by Andhari on
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I don't mind splitting but if a guy is being a gentleman by paying then I wont refuse him either.
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Permalink Reply by Allison on -
My boyfriend paid for the first couple of dates, but then we started alternating on who paid what. When we travel, it's 50/50, and we alternate on paying for meals. I actually make more than he does, and he usually travels to see me, so it really isn't fair for him to pay all the time. If we did that, then I imagine the amount of stuff we did would be cut drastically!
Dating is one thing, I think the guy should pay. But once you're BF/GF, then you're no longer wooing the person and you should be like any other couple that's married or in a LTR. My boyfriend and I recently opened a joint checking account that we're both contributing equal money to and then we'll just use that debit card to pay for things we do together. This way we won't have to haggle about who's paying what, since it's all coming out of the same pot.
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Permalink Reply by Kate on
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The joint checking for shared expenses for an established couple is a great idea.
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Permalink Reply by Mr. Apron on -
In my own personal experience, it's always the John who ends up paying for a meal. If you look at the situation objectively, this should not be the case, as he is already paying for a blowjob/rectal trombone, schmatzing, etc, etc, and quite possibly the motel room in which to do said activities. Really, as the John is the one shelling out the majority of the waddage (if you'll excuse the unfortunate expression) the Pros should be the one footing the bill for the food, in an ideal world. But, then again, in an ideal world, Betty White would be the Queen of England, and I wouldn't have ass-hair.
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