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Dealing with insecurities.
Lately, I've been feeling pretty much like a failure.
I'm in my last year of undergrad... and my major is speech language pathology. However, in order to be an SLP, one must attain their masters.
I decided earlier this year that I wanted to take a year off, just to have a little break from school and enjoy life in the "real world".
The only problem with this is I can't get a job in the "real world" that pertains to my degree without my masters.
My boyfriend alternatively, is a computer engineer and was just offered a great job for after he graduates that will ultimately pay for 100% of his masters if he so chooses to obtain one (jealous!).
Don't get me wrong, I am SO excited for him... I guess I'm just feeling a little insecure and jealous that he is having all this success and I really just feel like I'm sort of going nowhere. And I know this isn't true... but I just can't shake this feeling.
So, I'm wondering, what are your insecurities? How do you deal with them, especially when they're within your relationship?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Alicia on -
I have some of the same insecurities.
Ever since I was little, and I know this is going to sound weird, I've wanted to be an Accountant. I've gotten my Assocaites degree but haven't started my Bachelors even, and I'm 29. I won't attend the local college here because the education level of the professors is ridiculous, compared to other schools. In a way, I feel like I'm failing my husband because he makes a lot of money from the loss of his leg when he was little and it always bothers me that I'm not contributing anything. We're waiting to move closer to a better school so my degree will actually mean something.
How do I deal with those insecurities? I talk to my husband and about them. He's always telling me that he understands and he can't wait to support me on my journey to a career. I still feel insecure but my husband makes it better by being the compassionate man that he is.
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Permalink Reply by Kimberly on -
Thanks for responding and sharing! I'm glad you can relate... I think what we need to keep in mind is that there's no time frame in which any of these NEEDS to be done... it's just life and sometimes we have to roll with the punches. But it's so hard to remember that sometimes... and I'm not used to not knowing the next step in my life is going to be. I'm just not good at not being in control.
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Permalink Reply by Delightful, yet on -
I got an amazing job out of college and I didn't go to a grand school.
I went to U. of North Dakota. There are some amazing programs there, but really, I think jobs are looking for EXPERIENCE and the DEGREE not so much the college.
Correct me if I'm wrong, because I tend to be time to time. ;-)
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Permalink Reply by Megan (Pearls and Pears) on -
In my experience...you aren't a college student (or a recent college graduate) unless you constantly feel like a failure. At least that is how it was for me. I was a sociology major with a minor in women's studies and communications. umm... talk about lost without a job! I ended up starting my own business which is now pretty successful...I mean I am only 26, I have a long way to go. Don't feel like a failure... you will totally find your way. It just takes time. Enjoy this time in your life and have patience with yourself. Forgive yourself for the fact that you haven't found the perfect job... you will.
If there is one thing that I wished someone had told me in college, or right after college is that there is no right or wrong way to be successful. So maybe look at doing some jobs that don't pertain to your major and see what you find out about yourself... even if you hate it or it isn't what you want to do, I guarantee you will come out with a lot more clarity about what direction to take later. Obviously I couldn't find ANYTHING for what I graduated in so I started working as an event planner/catering assistant. Realized that I loved design and hated working 100 hours a week... so I I got into textile design and now I own a retail store specializing in home decor and personalized gifts. Pretty great... not exactly sociology though... :)
Megan
pearlsandpears.blogspot.com
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Permalink Reply by Noah Smith on -
your awesome. i lvoe your first few sentences. that is really how it goes.
:)
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Permalink Reply by Megan (Pearls and Pears) on
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It really is how it goes! The worst is going through it though... when it is happening at the time it feels so much like you are just wandering with no direction. Its one of those... "if I had only known then what I know now" and it was just a few years ago. haha
and thanks for the positive reinforcement... never get tired of hearing I am awesome... I mean who does?
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Permalink Reply by Kimberly on
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Thank you SOOO much for your response! You seriously made me laugh, made me feel a little relieved, and lastly- inspired me. :)
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Permalink Reply by Megan (Pearls and Pears) on
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I am glad that I helped!! It is so rough going through it... I so understand what you are feeling. I wish there were more people to tell me what I told you when I had to deal with that scary post/end of college stuff...I mean they tell you about adolescence, how rough marriage can be, mid life crisis, why doesn't anyone ever talk about how freaky your early 20s can be! So many people go through it!!
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Permalink Reply by Peppers on -
I used to major in SLP! And it was hard as heck... So props to you for being able to withstand it! I changed my major to something more fitting for me- psychology. As someone else said, I think all of us college kids feel like failures at some point. I am a senior and I haven't done anything extra yet to get into grad school (I have to get a masters to get a job too) and as we know, grad school is extremely difficult to get into without any research experience/volunteer work on your resume. So I feel like a failure since my grad school app is due soon and I have dicked around and haven't gone the extra mile to make myself more marketable. But whatever! Yanno? At least we are in college trying to achieve our goals somehow! We will eventually get to where we want to be... Simply because we WANT to get there.
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Permalink Reply by Kimberly on
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haha yes! getting into grad school is ridiculous without all the extras! And i'm in the same boat, which is actually why I'm taking a year off... so I can buff up my resume a little. :) Good luck with everything though! I hope your applications go swimmingly! :)
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Permalink Reply by Noah Smith on
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Kimberly, i can say this more than a few other, i know how ya feel. my major is communications AND communication disorders, or slp for short. when you want to be a slp it takes time but in the end its all worth it, i hope. all the work for helping people, thats it right there.
and can i ask why you want to be a speech language path?
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