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Does age matter in relationships?
Part of a curriculum that I teach to some grade eight girls involves a discussion on dating and relationships, and when it is age appropriate, and etc. Every group of girls I've taught has had adorable and interesting things to say on the subject of "how old is too old" (or young). But I'd like to talk about it with people my own age!
What is age appropriate? Do you follow the "half your age plus seven" rule? Does age really matter at all?
What is age appropriate? Do you follow the "half your age plus seven" rule? Does age really matter at all?
Replies are closed for this discussion.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by happinessisme on -
For me personally, I like an older guy. Now with that said, the last person I was really into was about four years younger than me, I'm 23. It was a cute experience but really I've found out that most guys don't know what they want and are just into playing games, so a younger guy really isn't going to be about anything. Plus I feel it's true what they say about women maturing faster than men. I think age does matter but less so as you get older. People can simply be in different places in their lives at different ages. Especially the 20's, the 20's are a very transitional heavy time. If I'm 23 and ready to graduate from college and I have a bf who is still in college, say starting junior year we might not be able to last. We now are about to embark on different lifestyles. I think any relationship can work out if the two people are both on the same page but generally I think age muddies the situation.
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Permalink Reply by Heather on -
I think it depends on the person, of course. Everones' maturity level is different.
As a rule, most woman mature faster than men, so it makes sense to me that females would date older males.
Honestly, I sometimes wished I'd married someone much older than me instead of only a year older! Then I might not have to explain why it's good to hang your towel up to dry after using it, lol. -
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Permalink Reply by Edie Right on -
My fiancé and I are 10 years apart. For us, it's perfect. But I think it really depends on the two people.
For us, we seem to be able to meet each other in the middle.
In high school, I dated a guy younger than me and that was the last time. And it wasn't as if I was specifically looking for someone older, it just worked out that way. Once I dated the "older guy" I didn't see guys my own age in the same light. Now that I think about it, I just don't really relate well to people my own age. All of my friends are older, some significantly older.
I think it basically boils down to the two people. -
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Permalink Reply by jay. on -
A few years or 10 years... I don't see that as a big deal. But honestly, what is a 40 year old man going to have in common with an 18 year old woman? That's where it gets kind of odd... that's when I think it matters.
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Permalink Reply by Lani Mays on -
I don't really have a certain age. I've dated guys younger than me but I didn't much care for it. I actually do prefer older guys. My husband is 7 years older than me but if I were single and met a man I was interested in who was in his 40's, I wouldn't let his age stop me. I'd draw the line on an actual "old man". You know, retired, age spots... Haha.
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Permalink Reply by Lena Triskey on -
Age ultimately does not matter, but many other aspects of a personality/lifestyle/outlook- things that need to be compatible for the relationship to work- tend to be correlated to a person's age. That's my take anyways.
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Permalink Reply by Freeman Dyson on -
I don't think that kind of thing should be discussed at schools to kids that age. It should just be said what the law is and not addressed or open a debate whether it is right or not. There is no right or wrong answer to it.
There is a certain stigma area about age in relationships and I think we all know where about that is. I try to abide by it myself. Not sure I agree with it but I don't like to be looked down on over stupid shit so it really isn't worth it to go against it. -
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Permalink Reply by Erin McCarthy on -
Fun fact: For Spain to join the EU they had to move the legal age of consent from 13 to 16.
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Permalink Reply by Orion 'Nips' Swift on -
Some people were upset over the Copenhagen criteria, at least that is what I've heard from older relatives.
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Permalink Reply by Becca on -
Well, it's funny how things change. I remember in high school I thought anything beyond 3 years of age difference was weird, unless the guy is older and I especially though the girl being older was weird. Well, today I am married to a man who is almost two years younger. It doesn't bother me because our maturity levels are the same. He's much more mature than most his age. I've also met older guys who aren't mature at all.
That being said, I've noticed it seems less weird for a man to be with a woman ten years younger than a woman to do the same.
Of course, with high school and younger relationships you have to be aware of the dating anyone under 18 issue. -
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Permalink Reply by Cassie on -
I'm not yet 21 and my boyfriend is 33. We have a 12 1/2 year age difference. There are a lot of people who have judged us for our relationship. Some people think I'm naive, some people think he takes advantage of younger girls, some people probably think I'm a little skanky and some people probably think he's a hero for "getting" someone my age.
Honestly, we say fuck all those people. We met 3 years ago and have been dating for a year and-a-half, and no other relationship (whether we're talking romantic relationship or just a friendship) has been this rewarding in terms of opening up my mind and my heart. Our personalities, our mindsets, everything is so in sync. And honestly, it hasn't stopped us from having "fun" because I'm still not 21-- we have fun whether we're at a bar or at his house cooking in our PJs. He's not immature because he dates me-- he's a full-grown, responsible man who, like me, wants to get married eventually but definitely doesn't want kids for another 10 years.
So yeah, I think it completely depends upon the people and the circumstances. I don't feel the need to defend my relationship with him, because I think our relationship proves itself to be more than legitimate. I certainly don't think that if, god forbid, we broke up, I'd have to go out and find me another 33-year-old. Many people that age are totally immersed in their adult lives of kids, marriage, carpool, soccer games, office meetings, etc. and I can't relate to that. Luckily, he and I are in the same place emotionally, and that's what matters to me. -
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Permalink Reply by margie wong on -
im 21 and im dating someone 12 yrs older
yes we are in different life stages and we probably have different goals as well but apart from that i dont think age matters at all. when i look at him, i dont see a 32 year old, i see a super adorable and caring man that im madly in love with. -
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