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Family Man.. Sweety or Cheesy??
What do you think about a family-man guy?
My boyfriend is very caring to his family. We are often missed our weekend time together because he must spend time with his family. Even if we were
together on the weekend, he involved me in his family events (family means big family! with his parent, siblings, nephews, cousins, uncle, etc etc). Lately I feel
saturated about it and refused to come with his family. He was a little upset and said that he was scared if his family think that we were selfish and they will hate me...
When we spend time together, he also often talking on the phone or texting with his sister, father, mother.. *sigh
Maybe it's a bit selfish to think like this, but I began to feel disturbed.. What do you think with a family-man???
My boyfriend is very caring to his family. We are often missed our weekend time together because he must spend time with his family. Even if we were
together on the weekend, he involved me in his family events (family means big family! with his parent, siblings, nephews, cousins, uncle, etc etc). Lately I feel
saturated about it and refused to come with his family. He was a little upset and said that he was scared if his family think that we were selfish and they will hate me...
When we spend time together, he also often talking on the phone or texting with his sister, father, mother.. *sigh
Maybe it's a bit selfish to think like this, but I began to feel disturbed.. What do you think with a family-man???
Tags: family, family-man, weekend
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Estelle Nagel on -
I actually think its serious. My estranged husband was a family man. He wanted us to go there ALL the time...not to MY family, to his. After a while I stopped going and he went without me. Now that we are split, he wants to move back in with mommy, which was what he really wanted all along. His family is GREAT but you have to cut the apron-strings if you ever want to build a real family of your own. We stopped "dating" and got incorporated into the family. I felt like a sibling and not a wife. Also, the family will constantly interfere. Even when he didn't go over there on weekends, they would guilt-trip him and phone him. When we would go on a romantic weekend, we'd get texted, "OK, well you havent been over in 2 wks, so make sure you're coming on Saturday..." It felt like the dates we had together where just breaks from seeing the family (where we were really supposed to be)
Where we'd spend Xmas has been a issue EVERY YEAR for 6 years.
I WILL NEVER GO NEAR A FAMILY MAN AGAIN! Love your parents, respect them, but don't make them your only social life. This is your 20s, you should not be stuck eating roast beef at Mum-in-laws' place.
www.lochessmonster.blogspot.com.
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Permalink Reply by Tann on -
yup.. that's what I'm afraid of.. interruption from his family on our marriage.. we plan to get married next year, but he implied that there's a possibility that his family will hate me if I don't act like they want.. it make me think a lot!
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Permalink Reply by Estelle Nagel on
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Well don't feel like the bad guy...I mean my ex's family was WONDERFUL but they had to learn that we were a seperate family as a couple. It did cause a lot of stress and ended up alienating us from our friends - its' so hard to find time to hang with people your own age when you are married and working, and when you are constantly at your fam's you get isolated.
Whenever I refused to go to his parents' place they would talk about me and how "cold" i was.
So speak up! They might not like you, but you really DO marry his family when you get married.
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Permalink Reply by dhpotter on -
there is a time and place for family, and although including you in his family life is great sometimes, there must be a boundry. If he can't find time to seperate your alone time from them then you need to either make him or leave him.
Some is good, too much is too much. You don't want to sem like a bitch, but if you're feeling neglected and smothered then you're not getting what you need. I like guys who value family, but there must be that line, and his family needs to understand it too.
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