The Bloggers With The Most To Say
How do you know when you're ready to move in with your Meaningful Other?
For those of you who live with your boyfriend/girlfriend (or have lived with someone at some point) how did you know you were ready to move in with them?
I'm writing a freelance article about this & just wanted to get other people's perspectives.
Ie. In your opinion, what are good reasons/bad reasons to move in with someone?
Any feedback on this would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!! xo
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Holly Renee on -
Anytime I have moved in with a significant other it has been so natural. I lived with my boyfriend of 4 years (before meeting me husband). My husband and I moved in together a few weeks before we got married. Both just happened. I don't even think there was a convo about it. It just didn't make sense any other way, or didn't even seem like a question. I don't regret moving in with either. I think the best reason to do it is because you want to live with that other person, period.
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Permalink Reply by Nel on -
I live with my bf, and have been for the past 1.5years, and its been great. Our main reason was convenience- he was coming back to the country after 1 year of being away, and I was moving out of my flat anyway. It just made sense to move in together. The decision was really natural too- I asked him one day, "do you want to move in with me when you get back?" and he said yes. I didnt spend time thinking about it or anything. It just happened. In fact, it wasn't until I told other people, "we're moving in together" and they gave me shocked looks like "omg, already? Are you guys that serious??" that I thought, um, maybe this is a bigger deal than I think it is? But it never turned out to be. Living together has been nothing short of wonderful as well as convenient (no ferrying between two houses, and paying double the rent). I trusted my instinct instead of listening to other people who thought they knew better (i.e. if I don't ask for your advise, don't give it!). If it feels right to both of you, go for it :)
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Permalink Reply by Lexi on -
when i moved in with my ex-husband it was fairly early on, about 3 months into the relationship. it was mostly because we were practically living together anyway- either i was always at his, or he was always at mine. it just made sense to get a place together and save money by not paying 2 sets of rent and utilities etc. We were also already engaged by that point. (yeaaaah.... not the smartest thing I've done...)
the BF and I have talked about getting a place together a lot. We want to move in together sometime in the fall or winter- we both have pretty chaotic schedules since we're both working multiple jobs so finding the time to go out on dates etc. can be pretty difficult. We've known each other for years- my ex and I even bought a futon specifically so that he had a place to crash when he'd come over to hang out, so he already knew some of my quirks and habits, and he'd definitely seen me with morning hair and no makeup before we ever started dating. When my family was gone for a week he came and stayed with me since I'm uncomfortable being here alone- it was nice to come home and just hang out, even if most of the time we were walking straight in the door and climbing into bed to pass out. There was no awkwardness, or anything like that, it was just really comfortable. The other upside of it is that we're both currently living at home- and of course, in your mid-20's living at home just isn't fun anymore unless you're lucky enough to have a basement apartment, guest house or something of that nature. We're antsy to get out from under our parents and actually live independently again especially since it feels like lately, neither of us actually have a life other than work and sleep- we're too tired to go out when we're off, but neither of our parents will let us have friends over to hang out or anything like that. Basically, that aspect of it boils down to a matter of convenience. But ultimately, its just because we want to live together and we enjoy being with each other.
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Permalink Reply by Mei on -
My BF moved in around the same time frame because I thought it was stupid for him to pay rent and never go home.... 7 years later and we're still together. Though it's always nice to still have your own space in the house even after you cohabitate. Sometimes you just need a little bit of space.
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Permalink Reply by Angie on -
I was with her for four years long distance. I knew I was ready from day one, but I was 13 so I couldn't really move in with her! We got engaged when I was 16, still long distance. I flew out to meet her face-to-face once I turned 18 and I moved in that night!
But seriously, I just knew from day one when I was 13, she was the only person I would want to be with, move in with, marry, etc. ^_^ And here we are, seven years later.
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Permalink Reply by Peppers on -
I knew it was time to get a house with my boyfriend because I was living in my mom's basement, but we always wanted to be together and he'd sleep over almost every night. I hated him sleeping over my mom's because it was awkward and I felt weird and wanted privacy. So we live together now, and I'll be honest, it sucks. Our relationship went down hill. If we didn't live together we'd probably still be all happy and in love and excited to see each other all the time like it used to be, but not anymore. I still feel that way about him though, I just get the feeling that it's not mutual. :(
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Permalink Reply by Scott Howard on -
Personally I would know that I was ready once she had accepted my proposal. I wouldn't live with someone unless I were engaged. I feel like I am probably in the minority there, so take that for what it is worth.
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Permalink Reply by leilani on -
I sort of feel this way also - except that I don't want to insinuate that I am ready to be engaged either! But... living together is a BIG deal.
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Permalink Reply by Mei on
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I would say living together is and it isn't a big deal. Some people do it more like a roommate situation and some do it like a "family" situation. It does change everything. You have to figure everything out, from how to pay the bills to how to to split the chores. If it doesn't feel natural and right, then don't do it! :)
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Permalink Reply by Harley Jane on -
I'd be a bit like this too, I think. I'm sort of torn. One part of me says moving in is a BIG deal, and why do it before you're married/engaged? The other part of me is like... what's the big fuss about? It's just living together...
Clearly, I do not know my own mind.
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Permalink Reply by Shayna on -
I have to agree --- living together means you're ready to start combining your lives. If you're ready to do that, why aren't you getting married? Because if you think it's only temporary you shouldn't be living together.
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