Online Dating: Is it ok to outsource?

A friend of mine was recently hired to write some guy’s online dating profile and message and set up dates with women as he would like to meet someone but doesn’t have time to set it up.

At best, it sounds to me like the plot of a terrible romcom, at worst, he could be abetting a lunatic/murderer.

I’ve blogged my thoughts already but what do you guys think? Would you be all right with having someone else pretend to be you online to get dates offline? How would you feel if you were one of the women my friend charms online and then went on a date to find the person was nothing like what you expected?

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Permalink Reply by Meredith on January 22, 2013 at 1:39am

Wow, I definitely didn't know that this was a *thing* that even existed.  If I found out a guy I met online did that, I would probably be pretty annoyed.  Setting up the profile, okay- don't friends in movies do that all the time to get someone out there? But the actual messaging, no.  In my head (though I'm sure other people have different objectives) I see online dating as a way to find someone with similar interests and get to know them a little better before doing anything.  Plus, guys you find in bars seem to be only after ONE thing.  If I found out that all of that was someone ELSE, I would feel like it wasn't really that person I was talking to.  That he was too concerned in being the best/perfect than just being himself.  

I think it's stuff like this that makes online dating seem so sketchy to some people.  You never really CAN know for sure who you're talking to online so this wouldn't add to the appeal for some people haha.

Permalink Reply by Ginny on January 22, 2013 at 4:28pm

I think having a friend help you set up a profile is fine because they should know you pretty well and can check you if something sounds crazy. "Girl do not put that you collect unicorns on your profile"

Permalink Reply by Lauren on January 22, 2013 at 10:02am

It's weird that someone would think to outsource. And your friend is the difference between a lunatic/murderer being able to date online or not. Maybe it makes him less traceable. idk. people know they have to be careful with online dating so while its definitely weird, it just is what it is. 

Permalink Reply by Tim King on January 22, 2013 at 9:29pm

I've personally written half the male profiles on OK Cupid.  Fail to see the issue.

Permalink Reply by Ginny on January 23, 2013 at 9:45am

only the awesome ones I'm sure

Permalink Reply by Sarah Hayes on January 23, 2013 at 9:22am

This sounds like a weird modern day version of Cyrano de Bergerac. And let me tell you...that one doesn't end very well.

But I agree with the general consensus -- it's one thing to have a friend help you set up a dating profile. It's something else to have them begin to form relationships with potentials for you. I feel like that's deceptive and pretty sketchy. And, as someone else pointed out, if you don't have time to even meet someone, what makes you think you'd have the time to invest in the relationship?

Permalink Reply by Sarah on January 23, 2013 at 9:56am

I thought of Cyrano right away too! So funny. I'll have to catch up with my friend and see whatever happened with this. I have no idea if he's still doing it and if it's been at all successful for this guy!

Permalink Reply by Eli on January 23, 2013 at 6:07pm

Terrible idea! I did online dating & I'll admit I didn't like all the writing, but that's where you can let your personality shine though. I am not a fan of false advertising. This actually makes me a bit irritated. If you can't take time out to write your own profile then maybe you don't have time for a relationship.

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