I don't think my blog is read by many people who are gay, so I'm hoping to reach a wider/more diverse audience by posting this question here. I recently wrote a post, or rather a rant, on Prop 8 passing in CA. But I honestly don't understand why it passed. You'll have to read my post to fully understand what I mean.
Also, here’s a question I’ve been wondering...if gay couples have to work so hard at the process of trying to get married (or at least in the U.S. they do), I have to wonder if they will work as equally hard, if not harder, at keeping their marriage strong? Straight couples can get married in a sinch, takes little to no effort. So do you think that lack of work to "get married" is part of the reason many straight couples don’t work hard at staying married?
It only makes sense that the harder you have to work to obtain something, the more committed you are to keeping it.
It would be interesting to see the actual statistics about the percentage of gay marriages ending in divorce, as compared to the percentage of straight marriages ending in divorce.
However, since there are so few gay marriages even allowed, I doubt we will see any type of REAL statistic or study on this for a long, long time! Sad.
Geek alert-- Cognitive dissonance theory does suggest that the harder you have to work to get something, the more committed you are to keeping it. The idea is that it is too incompatible to have worked hard for something you ended up not liking, so you convince yourself you do actually value it.
Whether that applies to gay marriage, however, is to be seen.
I honestly started tearing up this morning hearing about how people are going to have to cancel their weddings, or worse yet, have their marriages legally annulled as a result of Proposition 8. I am so appalled. I just don't understand why people feel as though they have the right to legally interfere with other people's relationships like that. Yes, I get that some people disagree with gay marriage on moral ground... then don't bloody have one! Someone else's doesn't affect you in the least.
Som gay marriages may be legally annulled as a result of Proposition 8? Really? I never heard of that, but that's terrible if true! So I wonder if Ellen DeGeneres's marriage would fall into that catagory?
I understand that a lot of people within the LDS faith might be against Prop 8, but not all of us are. I have been a "Mormon" all my life but am still pro-love and pro-civil rights and was deeply saddened when Prop 8 was passed and then upheld.
So, I get that you might be frustrated with the attitudes of some people down where you are, but please don't lump us all in together and I'm SURE that every person you saw protesting was not LDS.
Something those against Prop 8 might like - a large group of bloggers are banding together to show their distaste for California passing the bill. Let Freedom Ring - where bloggers, married, unmarried, gay, straight, whatever, place their ring (a ring) on their middle finger and flip the bird. :) Take a picture, and post it on your blog.
Diary of a Modern Matriarch started a log of all the people taking pictures, as well as an ever growing list of those who support this.
You can also add your picture of your middle finger raised proudly in the air at the Flickr group Let Freedom Ring
And here's my post where I proudly show mine... and some ducks.
It's something small that we can use our voices for... and it does make you feel a little better. :)
We are trying now because the parties have somehow had a rift between younger generations who for the first time ever it seems are not claiming a specific religion... they have their own set of beliefs. Back with the boomers this simply was not allowed! Blasphemy!
So like several other of you, I strongly disagree with my parents' religious and political beliefs. I've argued with them about gay marriage as my dad has 2 gay brothers. But no - they're staunch republicans against gay marriage. I asked why.
The response was that marriage defined by the pope is a sanctity between a man and a woman. Okay. Well that's on set of religions down, what about the rest? What about people who are atheist and get married. How does that work, because in the Catholic church you're both supposed to be baptised, communed, confessed, and confirmed before you're allowed to marry. Clearly 2 people that aren't Catholic can marry...
-Well it's still a man and a woman... that's what marriage is.
But what if, say we call it a union of sorts, should they still get the same benefits like insurance coverage etc. as a spouse would.
- ABSOLUTELY NOT.
Why not?
-Because those privaleges are reserved only for people that are married.
But if they're making the same life-time commitment, why shouldn't they be rewarded with the same benefits as a married couple?
Brief Pause followed by the pre-recorded because they aren't married, they can't be a marriage is a man and a woman.....
It just fucking blows my mind that generations of people are like brainwash stew, they still think of gays as 'fags', they bitch about how the Obamas are the evolutionary gap from ape to man.... I've heard this all before. Nothing compares to straight white suburbia.
Just last week I was at a funeral home when my aunt commented to my mom that her worst fear is that her two boys are gay. Neither has ever dated and they're going off to college. She would disown them if they were gay, she says. Meanwhile she's the executor of my gay uncle's will.
So it's okay if someone else is gay, just so long as they're not your children.
****Well Boomers, here we are, straight, gay, female, and male of all different religions and not to tell you.... just wait. One day we'll be in power. And you will not like the changes we make. You will cringe and hate us for the moral values we Will instill on our countries. Just fucking wait.*****
I love your passion for this. Very similar to my own, which is why I've avoided this thread for a long time now.
It's unfortunate the way Prop 8 turned out. It made me wish I were a California resident so I could vote and maybe help make a difference, but that simply was not the case. And it's sad that our parents, grandparents and the generations currently running this country don't see this issue as it is but rather as something based in religion. What the hell happened to separation of church and state?
How anyone in the world cannot see "gay people don't deserve to get married" as anything but a new form of "black people don't deserve the same rights as white people" is beyond me. It's the same argument, the same issue that they faced decades ago. And one day I'm positive that we'll see the same outcome. I just wish it were sooner than later.