The Bloggers With The Most To Say
Who Are You Blogging For?
I had a commenter yesterday chastise me for no longer being an inspiration. I went through IVF about a month ago, and the cycle didn't take. I have admittedly been struggling with what that means (and the $20,000 that was literally thrown down the drain), and I probably haven't been my usual sunshine and roses on the old blog every day.
She felt that there were woman who were worse off than I am who look to me for inspiration and support... not me wallowing in self pity - her words. Her point was that I owed it to them to get over my own hurt and turn my blog around.
And really, I was taken aback. Both because the post she commented on was actually a humorous one and not a sad one at all (not an ounce of self pity), and because; since when did I sign on to be an inspiration to anyone? Since when did writing a blog mean you had to pretend on your bad days so as not to bring anyone else down with you?
What do you all think? As bloggers, are we obligated to remain upbeat and positive on our blogs, no matter what we are going through in our real life, because that's what people want to read? Do you try to remain eternally optimistic on your blogs, without ever letting the muck and struggle of life shine through?
As readers, do you prefer blogs that are always sunshine and roses, or do you sometimes like to see a little bit of reality and truth?
And is it fair to expect anyone to be your inspiration through a blog? To expect them to "get over it" and move on, solely because you want to read someone who is upbeat and happy.
At what point as bloggers do we have some sort of obligation to give people what they want, instead of the truth?
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by Nicholas Ivanovich on -
I absolutely do not think that you have to act like anything in particular for your own blog. For a company/business blog, you absolutely should put everything you're going through aside to focus on exactly what the blog is intended for--business. But for a personal blog? It's for your own damn self. If you have an off day and feel like writing about it, then do it. Maybe your followers have been in a similar situation and they have something constructive to say that will help you through it!
Personally, when I read a blog (or subscribe to one) I just look for a consistent voice. I don't care if they're consistently whining about the saaame topic day after day--I just want each post to be written similarly. If sarcasm is your thing, I want to see it laced in to each post you've got. If using double entendres is more up your alley, I had better see at least a few fun puns per post. If you miss one or two, I don't care. But if you're all over the place... Meh. I'm not interested.
-
Permalink Reply by Annabel Vita on -
I prefer reality and truth with a bit of sunshine and roses!
You don't have any obligation to anyone - your blog is yours to do whatever you want with.
-
Permalink Reply by Leetid on -
Blogging is about you and if you are having a bad time of course you are going to write about it. We can't expect people to be happy all the time. But on the other hand if you have a blog that is all about happiness that is what your readers would expect to read. At the end of the day people don't have to read that particular post if it's not what they want.
The commenter shouldn't have done that as she is not in your shoes and does she really know what it is like to go through what you are going through.
-
Permalink Reply by Estelle Nagel on -
I think its supposed to be YOUR creativity...not their amusement. You aren't making money off off entertaining them, so you aren't obliged to do so. Fuck em and good luck with the IVF. I know that's crazy and emotional and painful to go through, so i hope you'll be OK.
-
Permalink Reply by Ginny on -
I just want to add that I don't find your blog to be a downer. You have some very funny posts and very real posts but I'm never like wow this girls blog is too depressing for me.
-
Permalink Reply by S.I.F. on -
Thanks Ginny! I certainly don't go for depressing, but I was starting to wonder if maybe it wasn't seeping through unintentionally! ;)
-
Permalink Reply by Kaye Pat on -
I think one can only write about what they know, otherwise what's the point? You're not really letting anything off your chest and your reader can see through you...writing as Lora said right below me...it such a healthy way to deal with emotions. These emotions come with life and that's just what life is, ups and downs. It's like an EKG - ups and downs. You can't start writing for your readers bc then you're just selling yourself short, there are going to be a lot of readers out there who will connect with your sadness and take solace in knowing they're not alone.
I'm also really sorry about your IVF so far, wishing you the best of luck on your next attempts!
-
Permalink Reply by Esther on -
I think at some point, people can get very invested in the blogs they read...and start to think that they have a say in what you write about.
I write for myself, and I think most of us do! If people don't like it, then they should just unsubscribe.
I've noticed a couple of other bloggers who write about fertility struggles also encounter problems with readers. I wonder why that is?
-
Permalink Reply by Yvie Sumthing on -
I started blogging cause I was bored..
I do it to make my own little history..
kinda like an online diary only not so exiting as a diary should be.
-
Permalink Reply by Amber Harman on -
I believe in blogging for yourself, and forcing yourself to be be upbeat and positive for readers is not being honest. I love bloggers who are honest, and write about whatever they are feeling. Everyone has rough times. We are human. I think there is room for reality and truth in every blog. Stay true to yourself :)
-
Permalink Reply by Ramblings of a Singleton on -
Oh wow, I can't believe one of your readers was so insensitive. Each individual's problems or concerns are important to them, and that's all that matters. I'm sorry to hear your treatment wasn't successful.
Before I started my own blog, I used to read other people's to see where I "fitted" with the world. I think, for a lot of people, it's about knowing that they aren't alone so, I guess, if the posts they're reading don't help lift their spirits or whatever, they feel let down.
I started my blog Ramblings of a Singleton to offer a forum for people to share their relationship stories, regardless of their status, and to build a sense of community. Maybe I'm being idealistic, as the blog is only one week old, but it seems to be working so far.
-
Permalink Reply by filleosophy on -
Well, I don't SOLELY blog for just myself, as I think it's a little silly to have a very public diary if it is only for you, you know?
At the same time, I don't think you should sacrifice yourself for your audience. If people don't want you, then they can go find a different blog to read.
Welcome to 20 Something Bloggers!
© 2012 Created by Lisa.
