my quarterlife crisis

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Melissa on February 23, 2009 at 2:47pm

Yes! I' 20 years old. I know who I am, but I do feel lost. As if I don't know where my life is going, like the road map was lost and I'm wandering blind. This is the point in life where we are left to figure out life, self-discovery, it can be scary...because you never know what you are going to find.

You are not alone, I promise you!

Permalink Reply by Angie on February 25, 2009 at 2:54pm

I'm turning 25 soon and my 20s aren't anything close to what I was promised. These are supposed to be some of the best years of your life, but we're getting majorly screwed in this economic crisis. Those of us with student loans can't afford to pay them back, those of us who want to attend school can't afford it, those of us without a degree can't find work, and those of us with a diploma aren't promised a job.

I definitely feel like I'm wandering around and trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. I wish that there was a sign somewhere that said, "Hey You!!! Do this and you'll be happy!"

Permalink Reply by Oats on February 27, 2009 at 10:49am

Life was fun and games when school occupied life, which lasted 9 years - 4 undergrad, 5 graduate - but once I left with a degree, I've been less than happy with the subject that my degree is in, I haven't been able to find a job or even get a personal interview for over a year now, and thus I've no clue which direction I need to go nor how I will get there. To top this off, I've only worked a 'real' 9-5 job once back in 2000. Since then I've been on a research schedule so I'm naturally scared shitless of that transition if it need be made. I really don't know what I do want to do, I have, however, learned from my mistakes and know what I don't want to do.

I guess that's something

Permalink Reply by Ms. Monique on February 28, 2009 at 12:53am

I understand completely! I'm 26 and have been having the same thoughts. Graduated from college but haven't actually done what I thought I would do or what I want to do... currently looking for work (which doesn't help). The game has changed so much, especially with our generation - we're figuring out that we don't necessarily want to take our parent's route for life.
I've been married for almost 3 years and have been second-guessing that decision a LOT lately too (no fault of his) because things are just not at all what I thought they would be in all aspects of my life. Sorry if that sounds like a pity party - I'm sure it could be worse. But don't feel alone - I think it's much more common than any of us knows. I guess we should all just keep taking chances and pursue our passions whatever they may be - at least we can enjoy the journey more that way! :)

Permalink Reply by Will on March 15, 2009 at 1:15pm

I just blogged about having a quarterlife crisis. It gets kinda whiny and dramatic. Sorry 'bout that. This one's pretty specifically about me and more of a diary entry than anything, but I'm thinking of writing in more generalities about it later, framing things up more as an article with an objective bent.

Anyway, yeah, I haven't the slightest clue who I am or who I want to be or what the hell I'm supposed to do with the next 40 years of my life. Almost every day, I think of a new career or opportunity or five-year plan I'd like to pursue, mostly because I hate what I'm doing and where I am now so anything and everything sounds better. What I'd really love is a five-year re-do. I feel like I'm no better off now than I was five years ago--in fact, I'm probably in an even worse position.

My high school reunion is this summer. I'll be 30 in two-and-a-half years. And then what? Good god. How the hell am I going to accomplish anything significant before then? What am I going to have to show for my first three decades on the planet?

Ugh. It's so overwhelming. I'm about to vomit.

Jesus, I'm so negative this weekend.

Permalink Reply by Ashley on March 23, 2009 at 11:06am

You guys are wonderful.

Permalink Reply by Just A Girl on March 29, 2009 at 5:25pm

A friend of mine just told me that he quit his job (that he hated) and is joining the Peace Corps and moving across the country. It's not the right path for me, but I wish I had his guts. I wish I could think of something I want to do that badly. He just said he's been thinking forever about how he needs to make a big change and he finally got sick of thinking and just did it.

I recently thought I was pregnant and realized exactly how far behind I am in comparison to where I expected to be by almost-25. I feel like I can barely take care of myself, let alone another human being. I found out I'm not (thank god) but it was an eye opener, for sure. I think I'll follow my friend's example on a smaller scale. Maybe just go back to school even if I can only afford 1 class at a time. Better than just thinking about it...

Permalink Reply by T ™ on April 6, 2009 at 6:29pm

I'm 25 also. I was in your shoes 5 years ago. Finding yourself takes time and you'll probably end up making a lot of mistakes along the way... but every mistake is a way for you to figure out what works for you.

I'm Not the same person i was 5 years ago, but suddenly my world has changed again. I think this is something that will end up happening through out life tho. At first i thought i was that Everything around me was changing, but now i know that it's just me. My friends are still the same, everything in life still is.. but i just don't feel like the place i am in is where i need to be.

the hard part is figuring out which road to take... and where to begin.

Permalink Reply by Valérie on April 15, 2009 at 9:29am

hey Jaime i hope your quaterlife crisis is going better! i just wanted to tell you that it's okay not to know who you are yet. You actually never know it in your life! you're changing through your life. The only things that matter is the actions you take all along the road. Your experiences, tastes and all that, are what is creating you everyday. If you want to talk about that, i have a loooong story about how i finally accepted that i don't have to figure out all that right now. I'd be happy to help you or any other 20something who need help :)

Permalink Reply by Valérie on April 15, 2009 at 9:43am

oh by the way, i put a post on my blog where i advise 2 books i've read that are very helpful!

Permalink Reply by Daniel Lai on May 3, 2009 at 10:16pm

Hey Jaime,

Totally right there with you... I picked up a book called "What Should I Do With My Life?" by Po Bronson. It's a compilation of about 40 short stories on people that have answered/struggled with that question. Not sure if it'll help with the mental gauntlet, but it's a good read I think.

Permalink Reply by Jennifer Hill on May 17, 2009 at 9:57pm

A couple of months ago I felt extremely lost and overwhlemed. I had no idea what the deal was. But I have since come to a better place. I no longer feel like I am losing my head. But I know exactly what you mean about how it feels like you have no idea who you are. And when you say it outloud you feel crazy. I am coming to terms with the fact that I probably am going thorugh the course of finding me again. all over again-but this time around I have three children and I am married.

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