to sex or not to love.....

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Will the Thrill on November 10, 2009 at 12:52pm

This is an excellent question.

In my experience, friends with benefits usually fails because one of the involved parties gets TOO involved... emotions get in the way - they screw everything up...

Personally, friends with benefits has worked for me a bunch of times in the past BECAUSE I was such good friends with those people... we understood eachother, and we knew that all we wanted out of the whole situation was some hot, steamy sex.

But to answer your question, love/like does not make sex better...

I have been in love with some women in the past who just couldn't excite me in the bedroom. In fact, some of the BEST sex I have ever had was completely random and unexpected (and, of course - SAFE) ;-)

Permalink Reply by ms rubies on November 10, 2009 at 11:21pm

and that's what i've heard a lot, someone is bound to get too involved. this guy is talking about dates and stuff, and i don't want that at all!

on the other side, i think love may not make the sex better, but it makes it more intimate. more meaningful. more paasionate, sex with someone who has no emotional ties to you sounds very empty and lustful which i guess is what some people want. that's what i want with the cleveland indian.

i'm sure this guy will try his hardest to rock my world so he can win my heart over.

Permalink Reply by Rhia Casinillo on December 4, 2009 at 4:57pm

i miss talking about this with friends :D

Permalink Reply by ms rubies on December 4, 2009 at 5:28pm

friends defin are fun with these subjects lol...
but what are your thoughts?

Permalink Reply by SV Girl on December 8, 2009 at 2:57am

I think being comfortable around a person, knowing what you both like, familiarity makes sex better. Having someone stick around long enough to create that kind of comfort can be positively correlated with liking / loving them... But I don't think that love necessarily makes sex better otherwise.

Permalink Reply by Susie Q on January 2, 2010 at 1:55pm

I've been in love.. And the sex has been bad. Nothing could have salvaged that. And I've had casual sex where it's been amazing. But one thing about the most amazing sex ever has been that I have known and trusted these people. I liked them as people and I knew what they were like.

I couldn't comment on one-night stands as I've never had any. I can't even think about engaging in something as intimate as sex with a complete stranger. To me, I have to like a person to do the dirty with them. I've slept with a couple of my friends (yeah. I get drunk, and when I get drunk I get horny! :D), and it's never ruined the friendship, BECAUSE we were such good friends and knew what it was all about. It's always been a one-time thing though, because friends with benefits-thing always ends up in one person getting a bit too into it, like the Not-So-Eligible Bachelor said.

Sex can't really be that great if you don't know what you're doing. My best sex has been with guys who have had several partners and are a bit older than myself. They know what they're doing. Hells yeah they do! :D

Permalink Reply by Jewely Hoxie on July 7, 2010 at 10:39pm

I think, like most people have been saying, it really depends. Just go out and have sex with people (safely, of course) and explore and learn! Sometimes one night stands will be boring, usually if it is with a guy and he doesnt know what he is doing (not focusing on the clit enough), other times it can be really hot because you don't know what to expect.
Being in like/like can help with the electricity or knowing how the other is feeling and knowing where to go on the body. Another big part of sex is knowing your own body and not be passive about getting your orgasms when your having sex. Masturbation is the best way to explore. If its not good with someone during sex, just start rubbing your clit, since its not very common to have vaginal orgasms.

Try to have as much fun and explore as much as you can while you are single. And then when you find a someone who knows how to treat you, be with them.

Permalink Reply by Charleston Chic on July 14, 2010 at 1:59pm

Sexual chemistry makes sex better.

I've been in love where the sex SUCKED, but you still love that person.
I've been in love where the sex was pretty good, but thats not what its all about, right?

Best sex of my life= Roommate. Go figure.