Cat's Blog Posts Tagged 'writing' (17)

When the Heart Speaks

After more than two years (still can’t believe it’s been that long) of writing this blog, posts don’t spring to mind nearly as spontaneously as they once did. I have to dig for them, sometimes scouring my life, the internet, the books, on my shelves, and conversations with friends for inspiration. But one of my favorite ways to find inspiration for…

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Added by Cat on February 5, 2013 at 1:38pm — No Comments

The Way Forward

I’m not usually the type of person to believe in signs and divine intervention. Despite growing up with a mother who swore up and down that she received everything she prayed for, that she and I were psychically connected, and nodded knowingly when something eerily fell into place like it was “meant to be”. I can’t tell you the number of times when I would call her up with…

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Added by Cat on February 5, 2013 at 1:14pm — No Comments

If the Writing is Honest

I’m sitting in front of a wall covered in neon post-its that are a welcome bright spot next to the window framing a gloomy winter morning. But their cheerful colors are about the only thing that’s making me happy about this collection of random thoughts at the moment. Because as I’m staring at this jumble, I’m silently trying to will them into becoming a coherent…

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Added by Cat on January 15, 2013 at 12:53pm — No Comments

Shell Shock

My weekends are starting to feel like desperate pauses in an endlessly deafening battle. With shells still ringing in my ears, I scramble around, taking stock of the situation. I snatch a few hours of sleep, feeling as if I’ve stolen them from a stockpile that isn’t mine and I’ll have to give them back when the theft is discovered. I do my best to forestall the coming storm, the resumption in hostilities when the Bouncing Betties and Moaning Minnies will screech overhead, turning my…

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Added by Cat on December 31, 2012 at 1:55pm — No Comments

The Big Bad Wolf

After a bit of hilarious distraction (see previous post) and a crisp walk in the cold, I sat down to write this morning determined to get my NaNo word count up nearer an acceptable level for day three. And then it struck, déjà vu style. That feeling when you open your NaNo word doc, notebook, or wherever you’re writing up that soon-to-be-hopefully masterpiece and think, “I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to write this.” Last year it hit somewhere around the 10,000 word mark and…

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Added by Cat on December 31, 2012 at 1:53pm — No Comments

The Writer's Life

Part of the reason I went home this past weekend (besides my mom’s cooking and taking a break from my real life) was to get my journals from about age thirteen to twenty-three. Except I didn’t actually realize how many there were. My suitcase coming back to my apartment weighed approximately a thousand pounds. But as I casually flipped through the pages with a wistful smile, I knew the sore muscles from dragging them through Penn Station would be worth it. If nothing else, the stacks…

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Added by Cat on December 31, 2012 at 1:46pm — No Comments

A Pause for Air

More and more these days, spending a weekend at “home” (at my parents’ house) feels like taking a vacation from reality. It’s a chance to take a deep breath, unlock my clenched jaw and put aside the everyday stressors. I’ll even, as with this weekend, unplug and let the pull of this blog dissolve just the tiniest bit. It’s not always easy. Even when I’m unsure of my words, the time I spend over coffee thinking of what to say here is an appointment with myself that it irritates me to…

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Added by Cat on December 31, 2012 at 1:44pm — No Comments

Rhythm and Rhyme

You would think that receiving a graded assignment with glowing commentary penciled into the margins by one’s writing professor would make me happy. After all, it’s been my secret (and now not-so-secret) dream for quite a while to be a writer. Shouldn’t having someone with even the smallest bit of authority on the matter decide my work is “evocative” and “lovely” make me jump for joy? Probably. Except that it was a poem. Which is not to say that there’s anything wrong with poetry or…

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Added by Cat on December 31, 2012 at 10:10am — No Comments

The Risk to Write

There used to be a certain risk in writing this blog. Not a big risk to be sure, it’s not like I slapped my name and face all over it. But it was the first time I allowed anyone to readanything that I wrote, let alone the personal outpourings and confessions that usually characterize this blog. I sweated every word and agonized over each post as I wrote. Was I being totally honest? Was I holding back to make myself look better or avoid embarrassment or shame or pain etc?…

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Added by Cat on September 27, 2012 at 3:57pm — No Comments

Second Star to the Right

Lately, I’ve been feeling a bit like Emily Dickinson…except without the really great writing. I’ve been all clogged up in my own brain and it’s not the most fun place to be. Actually, it’s kind of boring. After all, there’s only so long you can run over the same thoughts before screaming for relief. Emily Dickinson somehow managed to find new worlds in her own company. Before the internet and TV or even radio, she had enough personal wisdom about the world that she didn’t need to look beyond…

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Added by Cat on June 21, 2012 at 4:00pm — No Comments

Love What You Write

The other night, I was talking to an acquaintance who asked casually if I was still writing my blog. I laughed and replied that of course I was. My blog is my baby. I check on it throughout the day to see how many hits it’s gotten. I keep a running list on my desk of things I want to write about in case an idea doesn’t come to me when I sit down to write. It’s constantly in the back of my mind: how can I make the blog grow? How can I turn this into a blog post? Should I tell this person…

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Added by Cat on June 21, 2012 at 1:37pm — No Comments

The Secret's Out

Do you remember that part in Harriet the Spy when all her classmates find out she’s been spying on them and writing all about it? I think I might be remembering that wrong, but it’s close enough for the lesson of the day, which is: if you don’t have anything nice to say, make sure your blog really is anonymous and doesn’t randomly post to your Facebook wall because WordPress is colluding with the universe and its crazy sense of humor. Point being that the post I wrote yesterday, you know the…

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Added by Cat on May 24, 2012 at 3:00pm — No Comments

Has Anyone Seen My Mojo?

I could feel it as I resolutely and angrily pawed at the keyboard: this was shit. The words weren’t coming out right, there was no spark, and even I, the creator, didn’t want to read this crap. Okay sure, it was a final paper about the computational analysis of literature (I know, I don’t understand it either) but seriously, I’d written on worse topics with more inspiration than this. Hell, I’d written lab reports that sounded better than this. It was a slog through every single…

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Added by Cat on May 9, 2012 at 7:18pm — No Comments

Pen to Paper

I’ve always written to get something out. Whether it’s the journal I’ve kept for more than a decade, the stormy poetry I penned as an adolescent (and sometimes still do), or even this blog, writing for me has always been about what’s inside. It was therapy, a way to work through the thoughts and emotions that I couldn’t make sense of otherwise. I’d find myself coming to surprising conclusions by the end of a journal entry or a blog post, often things I hadn’t even thought of before I took…

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Added by Cat on April 12, 2012 at 2:27pm — No Comments

Leave a Message After the Tone

I’m in a weird mental space today. Perhaps it’s the morning yoga, when I literally saluted the sun as it rose. Maybe it’s the meditation that started my day and focused my mind on something other than the job that I don’t exactly hate but don’t really like either. It could be that conversation I had with the guy that makes my stomach perform double Arabians and my cheeks flare in a blush that no makeup can imitate or improve. It might be the quiet weekend I had, dedicated entirely to my own…

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Added by Cat on April 2, 2012 at 5:07pm — No Comments

NaNoWriMo Day 1: Deadlines and Distractions

The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. And the journey of 50,000 words begins with a single blank page. Yesterday kicked off NaNoWriMo, and after I finished the homework I had forgotten was due last night, I sat down in front of a blank screen to get going. And now I realize why Hemingway said to write drunk and edit sober. When it comes to writing a 500 word blog post, my inner critic is pretty content to sit by and judge stupid people on the internet (epic fail indeed). I…

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Added by Cat on November 2, 2011 at 2:00pm — No Comments

The Thing I Cannot Do

I’ve never considered myself to be a writer (which sort of makes 100 plus posts on this blog an unexpected accomplishment). A scribbler, yes. A dreamer? Most definitely. But a writer? Calling myself a writer seemed to imply a certain amount of talent that I just didn’t seem to possess, or at least could never see in myself. I never won essay or writing contests at school, though we were all required to enter. Sure, I wrote a mean paper in English and history classes, but that’s mainly…

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Added by Cat on August 29, 2011 at 5:10pm — No Comments

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